Tag: headcanon accepted

iidigestive-readerii:

Star Wars and the Jedi Council

We all see the Council meetings in Star Wars. They look very boring and often times in the freaking dark.

So enjoy my rambles I wrote at midnight a few weeks ago when I couldn’t sleep because chronic illnesses! Yay!

-Luminara coming into every meeting, robes pristine, not a speck of lint, even if it’s nope o’clock

-Ki-Adi tries to engage in meetings via holo, but is constantly interrupted by his seven daughters and five wives.

“Shea please I’m” “girls don’t! No not you honey” “yes Mawin I’m aware tomorrow is our anniversary.” “I didn’t spend the credits on – well did you ask your daughter?” “I know dinner is ready but-”

-Everyone finds great enjoyment out of Ki-Adi’s suffering

-Mace enjoys talking really loudly whenever a Council member is nursing a hangover

-He’s stunned when Master Yoda pats his arm and mutters “Whisper, you will” “Why?” “Indulge in *hic* drink, I did”

-Everyone – especially Kit Fisto and Depa – bring food to the Council Meetings because it’s 8pm and “I’ve been eating rations for 2 months!”

-A very confused delivery man showing up at the front of the Temple at 1am

-Said delivery man proceeds to be paid 300 credits for 8 space pizzas and garlic knots by a very serious and tired Master Yoda, who waddles all the way back to the chamber w/ the pizzas

-Obi-Wan always reading the minutes of the last meetings like a sports announcer (or Admiral Yuleran, when Anakin is present).

-His face is always deadpan

-Agen Kolar falling asleep constantly

-sometimes they start yelling to see how flustered he is upon waking up (jokes on them, he bought earplugs)

-Running bets about who’s sleeping with who (Eeth Koth keeps betting on Obi and Anakin)

-the padawan who helps with the meetings always tells the most outrageous stories. No one ever believes them

“But Master Yoda really did eat a bowl of cereal while talking to the Chancellor!” “Shut up Caleb! No one cares!”

persian-slipper:

smarsupial:

izzyovercoffee:

oolathurman:

cassiansfuzzyjacket:

identical-yet-not:

tripropellant:

jooferslannister:

izzyovercoffee:

now that I said that, I’m really curious if they have mandalorian grocery stores, and if they exist in diasporas across the galaxy (kind of like asian supermarkets), and what kind of things do they sell

This is a thing and I’m demanding it be canon NOW

things you can find in mandalorian grocery store:

• milk
• drink
• SOME guns
• guy with funny haircut
• a very kind of spicy peper for a casserole!
• undying spirit of canderous ordo

Define ‘some’, enough to fill a speeder or enough to blow up Kamino?

  • Jat’jahaal Brand cereal, shaped like little mythosaur skulls
  • Knives
  • Kitchen knives

bc i am asian diaspora and have asian supermarkets near me

  • an entire aisle devoted to spices
  • the entire supermarket smells like spices and it is homey and nostalgic even to outsiders
  • less than a fourth of one side of an aisle devoted to “intergalactic (aka western) food.” This includes the three kinds of cereal they have in that supermarket.
  • the entire produce area smells like spiced fruit despite the fruit not being cooked yet. bc obviously mandalorian fruit is naturally spicy right?
  • one side of an entire aisle dedicated to their equivalent of rice
  • the other side of that same aisle dedicated to instant noodles
  • another aisle dedicated to various mandalorian alcohols
  • mandalorian equivalent of durians
  • mandalorian equivalent of durians
  • mandalorian equivalent of durians

all right !!  IN ADDITION TO THE ABOVE:

THE PRODUCE SECTION

  • always fresh, (unless you’re in the dried fruits/vegs section). SOMEHOW.  could be a Shakraan (that’s the word i’m using for MandoMart now) out in the middle of whoknowswhere where imports are v expensive, and yet … they have fresh produce. every day
  • towards the end of the day, if they’re receiving a fresh shipment tomorrow, prices are slashed to move inventory out quickly. 
  • only local mando’ade appear to be aware of this, and it is always mayhem the last two hours before closing (or mayhem to aruettise B’), probably bc everyone is speaking some dialect of mando’a, either “standard” or a local dialect )
  • GOOD FUCKING LUCK if you’re not wearing armor at this time
  • mandalorian coconuts that they whip out a huge butcher knife out of nowhere to crack open on the spot for you to drink on purchase. They literally crack it open in their hands.

SEAFOOD

  • there’s a section completely dedicated to gi/gi’e/gise. Fish. Under the crushed-icetrays holding displays of fish, are tanks where live fish are swimming in. you can get them whole, or butchered on the spot. they butcher them right there, in plain view, so good luck if you’re squeamish.
  • kids love those tanks btw. be careful not to trip over them when ordering. the fish are usually incredibly terrifying to look at, and large enough to feed a family, and sometimes fight each other. 
  • shellfish, also huge. live space-lobsters big enough to eat a child. barrels of space crabs. No warning signs — you should know the risks.
  • if asked, they also have dried and spoiled/rotting fish/fish products in a dedicated back area. they have to be asked for, specifically, as they’re not openly accessible to the public — and only mando’ade know to ask.
  • every Shakraan family (as most of these diasporic stores are family or clan/house run) has their own unique method and recipe to gi’haale reflective of their family history, origins and location
  • but the smell is strong and especially pungent from this end of the store
  • there’s also a frozen fish/seafood section, separate from the live section.

SNACKS AND DRINKS

  • dried fruit. cookies. candies, usually flavored in mandalorian-specific spices or teas. dried sweetened roots.

    meat jerky. dried fish cut into thin strips. fish-flavored chips. everything has a spicy variation.

  • they all can be threatening-looking to aruettise (you got the standard snacks, and then some … weirdly shaped ones. fish shaped ice cream sandwiches. caramelized insects. cookies filled with some kind of flavored creams shaped like native mandalorian wildlife — even extinct ones).
  • nothing is in standard alphabet — everything is labeled entirely in mando’a. everything.
  • pastries have their entirely own section, separated by savory or sweet and shelf-life. also has spiced/spicy variations. 
  • they have (non-alcoholic) drinks that are really popular among mando’ade — and they’re always referred to with a soft nostalgic sigh. 
  • they’re usually softly spicy and/or sweet, with different flavor variations on top of the base sweet-or-spicy, with a unique opening mechanism that requires significant force to open the bottle in some way.
  • sometimes with a knife. sometimes with a fist. never simple — to those not used to nor expecting it.
  • all of the above is organized by shelf life, specifically, even if the local diaspora is considered a fixed community, mandalorians were once a nomadic culture and thus food culture still carries this idea of longevity.

TEA AND SPICES

  • mandalorians are HUGE on tea and spices, btw (they have at least two words for tea, and the implication is that tea is very common part of the culture. I’ll compile a post discussing this in the future) in addition to spices. they have at LEAST one long aisle dedicated to tea, and another to spices if not an block of the store. sometimes it’s the whole Shakraan, depending.
  • the labels are entirely mando’a, again
  • separated by type, originating locale, and price
  • if a dedicated tea section, will have a local expert with vast knowledge in multiple areas (including traditional remedies). he can assist if asked.
  • dedicated section is also close/near dedicated spices section. sometimes the experts of both work in tandem with each other to assist customers.
  • also a section dedicated solely to teaware and ceramics (plates, bowls, spoons, etc). it’s a small part of the aisle, or a small wall, but it’s usually from floor to ceiling

Obi-WAn is a regular at the one on Coruscant. He is secretly working on recipes to impress Satine. But like- he has to do it on the downlow because he has already been evicted from one Jedi barracks for the smell. (burnt ghost peppers- the other Jedi thought it was tear gas and held a spontaneous gas mask drill in the hall)

One day he runs into Maul in the tea section. They both pretend not to know each other. But for a split second they were reaching for the same package of tea (Pre Vizla’s favorite) and Things Were Awkward.

Jango dragging Boba in every week. (but daaa-aaad why can’t we have regular cereal for once?!?!?) The old lady with a huge knife behind the fish counter pinches Boba’s cheeks. She makes lewd propositions to Jango in what she thinks is a whisper but its like hearing-aid-batteries-are-low loud.

@deadcatwithaflamethrower

dayyjournal:

Obi-Wan wears like 53 layer of robes so everyone assumes he’s kinda soft especially compared to his ‘in the prime of his youth’ former Padawan but then one day he goes shirtless to spar and he’s shredded, he has an 8 pack. Clones and Jedi alike are choking on drinks and tripping into walls. Ahsoka is covering her eyes and screaming because that’s basically her grandpa. Anakin has to throw a robe over Obi-Wan like The Birth of Venus. 

Clone R&R Headcanons

tiender:

shaarabey:

  • Clones don’t get paid. Instead, they get issued credit vouchers to use out on the town. 79′s and a few other establishments accept these.
  • The medics in each unit work together to give a presentation reminding everyone about protection and consent and sexually-transmitted infections, complete with pictures and species-specific information. If anyone has any questions or “asking for a brother” potential situations, please come ask; we don’t want another situation like Sling over here who sprouted purple spots all over his legs and told us he karking didn’t know how it happened. Thanks, vod.
    • These quickly devolve into good-natured pandemonium with some people trying to embarrass the medics with ridiculous questions (“Hey doc: the condom goes over the twig and berries, right?”). The medics roll their eyes and take it on the chin, because ridiculousness is better than a silent lecture hall during question-time, but Force help these mir’shebe afterwards.
  • The water pressure in the showers is literally the greatest thing. No sithspit weak-stream trickle or (thank the Force) the sonic showers the cruisers have. Conversely, the towels are blindingly white, thin, scratchy, and generally unsatisfying.
    • For many battle-tested clones, the smell of industrial cleaner is associated with safety.
  • If someone wants a paint job—tattoo or armour—now’s the time to do it.
    The more artistically inclined among the troopers do touch-ups on the
    LAAT/i noses too.
  • Some clones from deployed units get heated with the Coruscant Guard because they’re not real troopers, when’s the last time you had to drag your vod away from the heat because his shin’s just not there anymore and he’s screaming like a dying mynock—((take a walk, brother, we’re all on the same side here.))
    • If you’re not a raging besom, maybe one of the Guardsmen will let you borrow from their Lost-and-Found of civilian clothing. (Some of those may or may not have been pilfered from careless birthborn officers.) These clothes are usually used as costumes or props in talent show competitions held between units or platoons.
  • Playing Two Truths and A Lie about crazy osik they’ve seen Jedi do
    • “They threw me off a wall, Cody. No warning, off a fucking wall—I thought I was gonna die.”
  • Some like the on-base holofilm theater, sitting unbothered in the dark, watching some half-decent romcom so they don’t have to think about that upcoming assignment on Bothawui.
    • “Why don’t they just talk to her about their feelings?” “I dunno, Resol; you asking me to fuckin’ explain birthborn psychology to you? Buggered if I know.” “No, but couldn’t they both just—” “To the drongos up front: shut up; some of us are trying to watch!”
  • Shrieks of “Kandosii!!” and “Kote!!” from the meshgeroya / limmie field (the older batches prefer the former term, the younger ones the latter). Matches between pilots and ground-pounders can get…interesting.
  • Since they have the downtime, units typically do their Remembrances now. Saying (or singing) the names of all their dead vode can take a long time (General Koon’s troopers’ list is currently pushing 7.8 standard hours), so soldiers take half-hour shifts, scrolling past name after name (some, only numbers) on the screen. The room’s acoustics make their voices echo, swirling the dead around and around the living.
    • No one’s ever really gone; they’re just marching far away.
  • R&R eventually makes the troopers restless, so they’re glad to leave when a new assignment comes down. When they’re out of atmo, some look back at the glittery planet, wondering if it’s the last time they’ll see Triple Zero.
  • Clones might not get paid, but they have a preternatural ability to get hold of credits. The quartermaster is a very popular man during R&R for his ability to sell GAR supplies under the table.
  • Packing up to leave means trying to stash as much contraband as possible for trade or consumption during deployment. ARCs are especially suspect.
  • Sitting in the windows of tapcafs and people-watching, marveling at all the different species with all the different faces (so many different faces! how do civilians keep track of them all?)
  • A much annotated and updated list of Free Or Cheap Places To Go That Won’t Throw Us Out, Don’t Fuck It Up For The Rest Of Us.
  • Wearing armour because it’s easier to hide in your helmet when everyone stares.
  • Not wearing armour because it’s easier to dance in, even if everyone stares.

yol-ande:

lumielwinchester:

yol-ande:

fadetouched:

not-so-secret-nerd:

rowanwould:

The best explanation I’ve heard so far for why R2 only woke up at the end, is that he actually does start booting up when BB8 first finds him; he just has to get through 10 years worth of updates before that.

I can literally accept that

Please do not power off or unplug your droid.
Installing update 1 of 27040 …

The question is: who writes updates for 50+ years old R2 unit? Is there some harried IT guy deep in the guts of Rebellion/Resistance who gets requests for exotic droid updates? Or maybe Luke writes some from his island out of the sheer boredom?

I am intrigued.

I bet it’s ghost Anakin…

This is excellent idea.

Anakin finding updates writing therapeutic after trying (and failing) to knock some sense into Kylo Ren’s head.

Both Artoo and Threepio got a lot of upgrades during this decade. A LOT.

I am pretty sure he also fell in love with BB-8 and wrote some… interesting… parts of their code. It would explain how BB-8 survived Poe Dameron.

(Force Ghost!Ben Kenobi finds it hysterical, but since this coping mechanism is way better than falling to the Dark Side and enforcing genocide he just shuts up.)